Am I just an extremely evil person or is it some kind of satanic influence, or what? I have no idea. I have no idea at all. Do you? Is it possible to be influenced by spirit beings? I know that sounds like an easy way to cop out and say that I couldn’t help myself, but from all that the Bible says, there are forces that have a direct or indirect influence on people’s behavior. The Bible calls him Satan. I suppose it’s possible because it sure seems like some of the thoughts aren’t my own, they just come blasting into my head… These thoughts are very powerful, very destructive, and they do not leave. They’re not the kind of thoughts that you can just shake your head and they’re gone. They do not leave. One thing I know for sure. It was a definite compulsion because I couldn’t quit. I tried, but after the Ambassador, I couldn’t quit. It would be nice if someone could give the answer on a silver platter as to why I did all this and what caused it, because I can’t come up with an answer. I don’t know why it started. I don’t have any definite answers on that myself. If I knew the true, real reasons why all this started, before it ever did , I wouldn’t probably have done any of it.